Little known but highly suggestive evidence has been amassed that in the period immediately following Hitlers last meal (a lunch of spaghetti with a light sauce) as Adolf and Eva Hitler went into Hitler’s personal study the poor creature pictured above was crushed by the door as it shut. Due to Military Secrecy the actual truth about the advanced Nazi genetic program was kept from the public until a freedom of information request in 2006. It turns out the Nazi’s,with their means justifies the end philosophy, had made a surprising amount of progress in genetic engineering almost all of which involved committing some atrocity. On the lighter side one product of the research was the five inch tall dog pictured above.
According to certain eyewitnesses the tiny animals had an extremely nice disposition. In an effort to keep down biting incidents among the staff the Nazi Doctors removed all aggressiveness from the dogs with a new drug they had just stumbled upon. This drug was intended to be used on the American and Russian troops in a desperate last act but at the critical moment they ran completely out of the limiting reagent.
So what happened to the drug? Well an American military doctor came across the formula and some of actual hand written lab manuals from various trials of the drug. The doctor then smuggled this information back to America and and began some of his own research using himself as the subject. These experiments have never been reliably described but they have been implicated in the doctors rapid descent into drug addiction. He spent the last 30 years of his life in permanent psychosis being cared for by his sisters who used to cheer him up by telling him Nietzsche had also lived with his sisters.
Luckily he summarized the results of the studies and copied out the formula and details of it’s production. It was from this notebook that Jong-Sir Horng found the formula for what was to be a new wonder drug. Fluoxetine hydrochloride or Prozac ….or Fontex or Ladose or Sarafem or Solax. Yes it was the extremely activating (In certain individuals) serotonin re-uptake inhibitor Prozac. This drug, though not found to be any more effective then the previous generation of antidepressants, was nevertheless described by the Psychiatrist and Popular author Peter D. Kramer as having the ability to make one feel “better than well”. This led to the eventual “discovery” of most of the drugs available to the psychiatric profession for the treatment of depression. By inhibiting the re-uptake of serotonin, norepinephrine and dopamine in various combinations drug companies were able to market a whole selection of drugs which according to FDA accepted studies all perform relatively the same in tests. New tests are performed all the time and new illnesses pop up all over the place all treatable with these drugs. Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Panic Attacks, Social Isolation Syndrome all get their ad space allotment