Absolutely as False as You Are

tears dripping from my eyes

She was over

People talked of her struggle
and of relief it was done.

that girl was scared to death
and had no where to go.

So she died alone.
There wasn’t a note

and

she was drunk as hell when she
took whatever ended up ending it all.

she stopped
it was over
her body

her body

was there for there for three days

in a chapel
I stood with my head down
gazing through the drops of water forming on my eyeballs
her father stopped talking and a pastor came up

and attempted to

shove all that feeling into some kind of lesson

having to do
with some fucking bloody corpse on some cross and some
guy named Paul.

fuck him
Does He Even understand suffering.
It doesn’t glorify people
it destroys them.
A suffering person is a person who gets blamed.

The glorification of Suffering is a symptom of a sick soul.
the person I am closest to told me that the worst possible thing
would be to live a long life.
how being around people sucked the life out of her
how she would gladly give her life for that of a cat

and then few hours later I lost all desire to do anything